Eight Emotionally Intelligent things Men can do Immediately to End Abuse
by Tyrone Dixon
Copyright © February 2018 / All rights reserved.
Recently, I had the pleasure of attending a Workshop with some extremely intelligent gentlemen. The workshop centered on what we as men can do to help end domestic and sexual violence, as well as address the issue of “toxic masculinity.”
At the end of the workshop each of us made a commitment, my commitment was to advocate on behalf of both men and women and not sit back and watch abuse take place rather physical, emotional, or verbal.
As a first step in the keeping my commitment, I present the following 8 tips, adapted from Author, Educator Jackson Katz’s 10 Things Men Can Do To Prevent Gender Violence:
1. Understand that this is not only a women’s issue! We as men can be advocates by speaking up, and confronting abusive peers. 90% of domestic and sexual violence is committed by men; chances are you know/have hung out with someone who was physically or verbally abusive. Speak up!
2. If you associate with individuals (friends, brother, coworker, etc.) who are disrespectful or abusive to females, don’t remain silent. Stop the abuse, and then recommend they seek professional help with dealing with unaddressed trauma in their lives.
3. Have the self-awareness to look at the way you live your life. Question your beliefs and attitudes towards women, without becoming defensive. How might the way we live inadvertently perpetuate sexism and violence? When you are able to take an introspective look at yourself, you can begin to change bad habits.
4. If you suspect someone you know is being abused or has been sexually assaulted, kindly ask them if there is any way you could help. Please don’t become aggressive/threaten to assault the perpetrator, this is not the support the person close to you needs in the moment.
5. If you are emotionally, psychologically, physically, or sexually abusive to women, or have been in the past. I invite you to seek professional help because you may have suppressed trauma that is preventing you from being your true self.
6. Be an ally to women who are working to end all forms of gender violence. Attend rallies and other public events to show your support. On March 23rd, 2018 Vera House Incorporated will be holding its “24th Annual White Ribbon Campaign” to raise awareness about domestic and sexual violence, this would be a great way to get involved and become an ally.
7. Educate yourself and those around you by attending programs, watching videos online, and reading articles about causes of gender violence. Understand that larger social forces affect the conflicts between men and women.
8. Mentor the next generation of young men about how to be a man in ways that don’t involve degrading or abusing women.
Peace and Love,
Tyrone Dixon works as a Certified Professional Coach in the Syracuse Community through his business ArozeThrough Concrete Coaching. He was born and raised on the South and West Sides of Syracuse. He has a Bachelor’s Degree in Business Administration from SUNY Buffalo. It is his pleasure to be a “writing contributor” for CNY Latino, and write about the topic of Emotional Intelligence (EI). He loves the City of Syracuse and believes that exposure to Emotional Intelligence can help change the direction of the individuals living in some of our “high poverty” areas. Can you imagine how much better our city would be if people were taught how to manage their feelings without hurting someone? Or if we could teach people to be proactive in identifying situations they are not comfortable in?.